Arg, Me Matey
by Golfing Pirate
Summary: Kim Possible is a notorious sea pirate. Life is going swell. That is, until she picks up a mysterious castaway. KiGo.
1. Marooned

Disclaimer - I don't own Kim Possible or related characters. This idea is my own. But that's about it.

Warning - Nothing bad in this chapter

Other - I'm pondering this story; I hope to keep it updated, as long as there is a soul(s) out there who wants me to. I'm not sure how long this will be, but it sure isn't a oneshot. I'd really appreciate some reviews; it lets me know what you're thinking.

And yes, in the long run, this will be a KiGo story.

* * *

There was nothing quite like the smell of salt air in the morning, or the feel of a cool sea breeze rifling through crisp white sails. The gentle lapping of waves against the firm wood of the Impossible was a comforting noise to its captain. The Impossible was one of the fastest ships on the high seas, with a crew to match. Its captain was fairly tall, though not monstrously so. Upon his head rested a red bandana complete with black polka dots, securing down a mess of red hair.

His outfit consisted of long, billowing white sleeves that were sewn into a small red vest. The vest cut-off above his abdomen, securely tied across his chest. At this point the observer would have to realize that this captain was decidedly female. Her stomach was bared to the world and her pants hung enticingly low. A small black belt hung loosely around the breeches, solely there for the sake of having a place to sheath her sword. Completing the effect were long boots, starting just below her knees, down her shins, and covering her feet.

One of her hands rested upon the hilt of her rapier. She was standing at the fore of the ship, eyes scanning the empty blueness of the ocean. There was no sign of land.

"Cap'n?"

Her reverie was broken by her first mate, a young lad with a mop of blond hair named Ronald. They had grown up together and she had convinced him to become a pirate with her, even though he was dead set against it. He was a nervous fellow with a tendency to panic under pressure, but his advice was as good as it got.

"Yes, Ron." Her eyes remained glued on the water.

"Betty spotted land!" He was grinning; she could tell from the inflection of his voice.

"We head for there, then." She listened to his feet clopping away. He was a sweet boy, really, and it had hurt turning him down when they were younger. In her life pursuing her goals came first, romance later. That wasn't something Ron understood. He did understand, though, being a best friend.

Up in the Crow's Nest, Betty Director glanced back through her telescope. She had lost left eye in a battle thirteen years ago, but her one good eye was as sharp as an eagle's, making her invaluable to the pirate crew manning the Impossible.

There was somebody on that island they were approaching, but she couldn't make out any more than that. The island itself appeared uninhabited; there were no buildings around, only miles of palm trees and white sand.

A small pink rodent scurried up to sit next to her. It chattered at her for a moment, and she nodded. Ron had given the orders to set sail for the island.

"Thanks, Rufus."

Rufus nodded quickly and ran back down the mast. He returned to his customary spot on Ron's shoulder. Most pirates owned parrots, if they owned any animal, but Ron was deathly afraid of parrots. He was deathly afraid of a lot of things, but not naked mole rats.

Half an hour passed and Kim Possible finally stepped away from her post. She had spotted the island for herself and was confident her crew could get there without issue. In the hold of her vessel sat a few treasure chests filled to the brim with jewels and gems. This island was to be the burying site.

She retired to her quarters, relaxing in a hammock. There was not much left for her to do while she waited. A blank sheaf of paper sat on her desk, piercing her with its gaze. The full ink well next to it glared along with its depressed friend. Kim rolled onto her other side.

She should write to her family but she couldn't bring herself to. It had been three years since she had left home, disappearing in the dark of the night. Her parents were both greatly respected individuals in the community, her mother a medical doctor and her father a scientist, and it would bring ruin on their names if anybody were to know that their only daughter became a world renowned pirate.

Knocking on the door woke her up – she must have fallen into a cat nap in her boredom – and she toppled to the floor. Straightening her garb, she opened her door, expecting to see Ron wringing his hands.

Instead she was met with the frustrated face of her helmsmen, Barkin.

"Cap'n Possible, we can't get no closer. The waves be too strong."

"Send out scouts to check out the island. Tell them to return in thirty minutes."

He nodded and trod into the dimming sunshine like the troll of a man he was. There was not much physical attractiveness going on with Barkin; he was a muscle bound man with very little going on upstairs. His nose was bent in several places and most of his teeth were tarnished gold.

Kim shivered slightly. Although Barkin was not handsome, he could hold his own in any brawl and she was glad to have him on her side.

She sat down at her desk, determined to pen a letter home.

_Dearest Mother and Father,_

_I am greatly apologetic that I have not written sooner. I realize that it has been three years since you last heard from me._

She stopped for a moment, nibbling the tip of her quill. Dunking it in the ink, she tried to continue.

_I have Ronald with me and we are both doing well. Ronald is still as up tight as always, although I am not sure that is a good thing. He now has a pet rodent named Rufus, who is to all appearances extremely intelligent._

Her parents, she knew, would want to know more about her at this point, but she couldn't bring herself to talk about herself.

_Ron sends his pleasantries and hopes you both are well. I am enjoying life on the ocean as much as can be expected. There is a sense of freedom with what I do, as you might imagine._

_I understand that it must have come as quite a shock that I had abandoned my life to set sail, but I wish you to know that this is what I truly want to do with my life. I know it is not respectable and I know that is a dangerous occupation._

_I have not gotten injured myself in these past three years. Nor have I pierced any part of my body, nor gotten any tattoos. That should come as a relief to you._

Her writings were disturbed by another knock on her door. She was all too happy for the interruption.

"Come in."

Ron poked his head in, "K.P.? You should come up and see this."

Setting down her quill, she tailed him to the deck. Her crew was crowding around in a circle making it impossible for her to see what they were staring at.

"All right you bilge rats, back to your duties."

The dispersal was almost immediate. Kim took a step closer and stopped as she took in the pile of clothing at her feet. Well, it wasn't all clothing. Kim prodded it hesitantly and nearly jumped back as a hand reached out and grabbed her finger.

"Please… parlay…"

"Get this man some water!"

The pile shifted slightly, revealing a pale green face gaunt with lack food and dehydration, "Woman."

Kim blushed, "Get this woman some water!"

The woman coughed weakly, "Parlay…"

"I heard you the first time," Kim snapped briskly. She wasn't used to finding people on abandoned islands, "I won't hurt you when you're in this shape."

"Thanks."

A deckhand hurried over with a small bowl of water. The woman slurped it down greedily before collapsing back to the ground.

"Bring me some biscuits, quickly."

The next hour or so was spent making the newcomer comfortable. Kim learned that the other woman was named Shego; obviously a nickname but since her guest was not forthcoming with the real thing, it would have to do. Kim sacrificed her personal hammock for the weaker woman.

"You don't have to… Why are you being so… so nice?" Shego's voice held a sort of dry sarcasm.

"It's who I am." Kim was greatly respected by her crew, and the crews of others, because of the mercy she displayed. She wasn't the kind of pirate to rob without reason, or kill without provocation. It seemed, at times, that she was too kind to be a real pirate.

Shego smiled crookedly, "I see."

"I will let you sleep, then. I hope you don't mind me writing in here for a little while."

"Thanks, Captain…?"

"Possible, Kim Possible."

"Alright, Kim Possible." Shego settled down and rolled onto one side, slipping into sleep.

Kim sat back down at her desk, staring at the half written letter.

_I'm pondering on sailing by home in half a year to check in. I know I am long overdue for a visit. Please understand that I cannot set a fixed date for visiting; as I am a wanted pirate now, I must tip-toe around. There is a chance this letter might be intercepted, and I want no trap set for me._

_Give the tweebs my love._

_Sincerely,_

_Kimmie_

Swallowing roughly, she folded the paper and slid it into an envelope. If she didn't seal and address it now, she knew she would rip it up later. Grabbing a candle and a ball of wax, she dripped bright red wax onto the mouth of the envelope. Then, jamming the ring on her pointer finger down into the molten wax, left her seal: three horizontal slash marks with a feather in the center.


	2. Go and Sons

Disclaimer – I don't own very much. I own my hat, my left sock, and the keyboard. But not K.P. and all them.

Warning – Here starts the shaky KiGo.

Other – And so the story continues. Unlike my last chapter, though, I now know exactly where I'm going with this story. Now all that's left is getting there - exasperated sigh - Cheers!

**This is an edited version. I felt the need to go back and fix a few things.**

For each review I get, one less circus bear falls from his unicycle.

* * *

When Shego woke up again it was dark out. Kim was no longer at her desk, and Shego was alone in the cabin. Yawning, Shego sat up and stretched; it had been a long time since she had slept so well. Hitting the floor, she ambled to the door, smoothing out her mess of thick black hair before exiting.

The night sky was filled with twinkling lights, the stars winking at her brightly. Very few people were around, only the occasional deckhand checking up on the ship and the helmsman keeping course. At the front of the ship, leaning on the railing and looking quite out of it, was Captain Possible.

"Captain Possible?" Shego approached, subdued.

"Kim."

"How about Princess?"

"Kim."

"Kim it is, then."

"Yes, Shego?"

Shego shuffled her left foot uneasily for a moment. She had been thinking about this while she was stranded on the island and she had the slightest fear that Kim would reject her request. "I want to join your crew. I can carry my own weight, both in battle and around the ship."

Kim glanced Shego over, appraising, "In your current state, I won't allow you to touch anything. What you need is some rest. When I find you in perfect health, you may join my crew." Another crew member would mean lessening the load on her preexisting crew, and Kim knew they were under a large load. The Impossible was a large ship that needed constant vigilance by her workers.

"Thanks, Princess." Shego smirked; she enjoyed pressing her luck.

"Kim."

"Pumpkin."

"Captain Possible." Kim snipped back, nearing the end of her rope.

"Kim." Shego smirked, "Aye, aye."

There was something about Shego that made Kim think that Shego had never been a pirate before. Shego had belligerency with words that meant that she was either a landlubber, or a captain. No deckhand would talk to their captain that way.

Kim nodded, gazing back out across the water, not noticing that Shego leaned next to her. They were silent for a few minutes, just enjoying the view. The silence was broken with the dull roar of the waves ravishing anything that it came into contact with.

"Kim… why do you look so out of it?" Shego asked voice low. It was dangerous territory she was entering. There was the chance that Kim would ask about her family, which was not something Shego wished to discuss.

"I wrote a letter to my parents. I'm apprehensive of sending it, but I have to." Kim's hands clenched uneasily on the rail.

"You still talk to your parents? They don't mind that you're a pirate?"

Kim cleared her throat, a blush tingeing her cheeks. "Theydon'tknow." She spat it out rather quickly.

"They don't know? That's rich!" Shego snickered.

Glaring, Kim smacked her would-be crew member, "Watch it."

"Sorry, Pumpkin."

Kim shrugged off the nickname, deciding it was a waste of breath to correct the wayward woman. "We're going to stop in Portsmuth for a while. I don't know if you have any business you have to take care of, but you are free to do it when we get there."

Shego gulped quietly; just the place she didn't want to go.

"That's nice. While I'm at it, I might as well gouge my eyes out."

Kim narrowed her eyes, "I didn't say you had to."

"Whatever." Shego edged away from that subject, "So what's with the buffoon? The blond kid who fainted when he saw me?"

"Oh, that's just Ron. He's my dearest friend, though he is a little cowardly." Kim smiled fondly at the thought of him.

"Oh." Shego snorted, "More than a little."

"Don't put him down. If I catch you calling him buffoon, there will be consequences." It was infuriating, Kim thought to herself, that one woman could so easily slip beneath her skin.

Shego rolled her eyes, "Alright Captain."

Nodding curtly, Kim made her escape to her cabin. She pulled the blanket off the hammock, spreading it on the ground. Shego, as the guest, would get her hammock until they got one set up for her in the crew's quarters. Kim snuggled down, immediately drifting to sleep.

Muttering softly, Shego came into the room. Part of her wanted to leave Kim on the ground, but something deeper made her pause. Disappointed with herself, she lifted Kim into the hammock and lay down on the ground herself.

This was totally out of character, she reprimanded herself. But, she reasoned, it was the least she could do for the woman who had saved her. Although she wasn't particularly tired, she forced herself to rest. Who knew when she'd get another reprieve?

Kim woke up while being moved and she smiled softly. Maybe Shego wasn't as bad as she was coming to think.

* * *

Shego had settled down and into life on the Impossible with ease. The crew readily accepted another helping hand, and Kim found herself growing fond of her newest crew member. Shego had, though, gotten finickier and finickier the closer they drew to Portsmuth. When the ship ported, she was the first one off the ship, scuttling away to only she knew where.

A week after picking up Shego, they landed in Portsmuth. The crew scattered on the strict orders to not make trouble and be back by sundown. Portsmuth was a busy town, and nobody blinked twice at pirates as long as no chaos was created. There was plenty for a pirate to do, should he or she know where to look. Taverns lined the harbor, lit up brightly to attract guests. Inside, one could find alcohol, gambling, prostitutes, drugs, whatever the errant sailor would desire. Most of Kim's crew entered these establishments with heavy purses, and left considerably lighter.

Kim's first stop, as much as she hated doing it, was the post office. It took her three minutes to send off the letter, but it was torture for her. At any time she could have ripped the letter up, or just not sent it, but now it was out of her hands for good; in a way that was liberating. Now it was up to fate.

There was a troubled tension building in Kim's stomach. She tried to dismiss it, but it only grew in magnitude. Anxious, Kim left the building and headed back to the ship. She was only staying until sun down because the crew loved coming ashore for action. They got their fill of robberies, battles, and rough weather on the ocean, but they missed the interaction with new people.

As Kim was on her way back to the ship she spotted a familiar face hanging around outside of the largest house on the busiest street. The sign out front labeled the house as _Go & Sons_. The figure appeared incredibly nervous; they took a step towards the door, then two steps back, then returned to the door, shook their head, walked away, and returned.

Kim watched with growing interest as Shego finally entered the building.

"Good evening," A large, bulky man sat behind a desk a few sizes to small for him. He didn't look up from his work, "I am Henry Go; what can I help you with?"

"Where's dad?"

"Shelley!" Henry looked at her, stricken, "Last we heard was that you were kidnapped and ransomed!"

"Yeah, I was. Now I'm not. Where. Is. Dad?"

Henry shook his head, shaking out his wonderment, "Back office. Are you angry with him?"

"No." She stormed past her stunned brother, a woman on a mission. Her brother was a bit of a bone head. He was utterly loyal to their father, which bothered Shego to no end. "I'm furious."

The man she wanted was immersed in paperwork. He glanced up when she entered, his eyes widening, "Shelley! Thank goodness you're unhurt!"

"Can it, old man." She snapped at him, "Why didn't you try and rescue me?"

"We had no idea where you were. There was nothing I could do."

"And you didn't even bother trying to ransom me."

"I will not give into pirates." He fiddled with a few papers, trying to look busy, "Besides, if I gave in this time and paid them off, people would know that I am an easy target to take money from. And that would not be a good thing."

Shego scoffed, "Whatever. I just came to tell you that I am no longer a part of this family. You can keep your blasted sons."

Mr. Go stared at her for a moment, "You think I would have paid for one of my boys?"

"Yes." She stated flatly, waiting for a reaction. If he had said that he wouldn't have, she wouldn't believe him.

"Well, I would. They are actually worth something." He moved his head to the left, barely dodging the heavy book chucked at him.

"I'm joining a pirate crew. How does that float your boat?" Shego was proud of herself. She had finally found the potato to jam up her father's tail pipe.

His face screwed up, turning bright red, "No daughter of mine will be a pirate!"

"Too late, _Dad_." She spat at him. Spinning on her heel, she stormed from the building and back onto the ship. She stormed all the way back into Kim's cabin, only to find it otherwise occupied.

"Good evening, Shego." Kim muttered, head flattened on her desk. She had returned to the cabin shortly after Shego had entered the building. There was nothing to be gained from hanging around outside.

"Please don't talk to me." Inwardly she winced. When did she ever say please?

"What happened to you?"

"A run-in with a fat man."

Kim giggled softly, "Oh. Is Mr. Go that bad?"

Shego's face paled, "What?"

"Go and Sons, isn't that the company? I could have sworn that's where you went."

Cursing under her breath, Shego plopped into the hammock, "So what if I did?"

"Why did you go there?" Kim seemed drained of energy.

"I… I had some business to take care of. As it turns out, I'm not entirely welcome there." Shego stared at the wall stolidly. She told herself silently that her father's opinion didn't matter. So immerse was she in chanting that mantra in her mind that she didn't notice Kim's arms snaking around her body.

"You are welcome here." Shego snapped to attention as Kim tightened said arms, giving Shego a hug.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Kim gazed at her, a slightly daffy smile dancing on her lips, "Giving you a hug."

"Get your hands off me." Shego snarled half-heartedly. Somehow this wasn't worth the battle.

"No."

When Kim persisted, Shego gave in, leaning into the warm embrace, "You're a bad influence."

Kim smirked, "Yeah, I guess."

"What kind of a pirate are you?"

"A charming one. Brave, dashing, beautiful, terror of the seas." Kim joked, trying to lighten the mood, "And one who cares." A moment later, as an after thought, she added, "About you."

Shego swallowed roughly, trying to ignore the bubble of feelings welling up in her, "Great. Can you let go, Pumpkin?"

Kim's smile faded slightly as she complied, "Yeah."

"Did you pick up a new hammock? I can't steal yours forever."

"As I know, you don't use mine anyways."

Shego shrugged, pretending that it was no big, "Well, you need it more than me. I'm used to sleeping on the ground."

"I see. Well, I got you one. I'll have one of the crew hang it later." Kim stared at the inkwell on the desk, "I sent the letter."

Caught off guard by the rapid change of conversation topic, all Shego could manage was a small, "Oh?"

"Now they'll know." It was Kim's turn to feel ill at ease.

"Doesn't mean anything. Could still get lost in the mail." Shego grinned deviously, always the cynic.

"What do you think they'll say?" The worry had been eating at Kim since she left the post office, "What if they won't accept me?"

"Then they're damn stupid people." Shego muttered, "I can relate."

"I guess I won't find out for a while. I told them I might come home later in the year."

"Well that was a stupid thing to say." It was hard for Shego to comprehend. Why would any grown pirate want to go home to their parents?

"I know." Kim scratched the back of her neck. She didn't wish to continue the conversation so she went out onto the deck and gazed around. There had to be something that required her attention.

Scrambling up the gangplank, Ron darted to her side, completely out of breath.

"Will… Will started a fight!" He managed to gasp out.

"We're talking about the same Will, aren't we? The straight laced kid I hired as a cabin boy?" Kim found that hard to believe.

"He had… a few drinks… hit this humongous guy…" Ron licked his lips. "You gotta get down there and break it up."

Kim was only too glad for the excuse.


	3. the Frugal

Disclaimer – If I owned any of the characters, Ron would be able to fly, or something whack like that. But I don't. And Ron remains flightless.

Warning – Yarr.

Other – Well, as it turns out, I'm a scatterbrain. Imagine that. AH! Side-note – I changed the previous chapter slightly and added to it because I hate when things aren't worked out enough. There's not a whole lot different, but there is hinting at a bar fight. It's probably a good idea to glance over so I'm not throwing you through a loop with this chapter.

Please note that the primitive CPR used in this chapter is shaky, not because I don't know what I'm doing, but because it's how I feel like using it. Do not use these directions in a real emergency situation, kay?

* * *

For the next week or so, the crew was on edge. The weather was steadily declining from beautiful to dangerous, the sunny skies turning disappearing behind storm clouds. The threat of a storm loomed over them, making each crew member antsy. A storm could mean disaster for them, and land was no where in sight.

They had left Portsmuth after Kim had broken up the bar fight. Will was entirely embarrassed when he sobered up and worked even harder than he had before. Kim thought he must be trying to set some sort of record; he did all sorts of chores quickly and efficiently, with no sign of complaining. After being questioned about it, he saluted, clicking his heels, and replied that he was just doing his job to the best of his ability.

Sometimes Kim just wanted to bop him on the nose. He was bound to run himself into the ground. At any given moment he could found running in several different directions, doing several different favors for several different people.

The one person he refused, flat out, to do favors for was Shego. She went out of her way to pick on the overzealous boy. Whether it was tripping him as he was trying to do something, or verbally bashing the young man, she tried to make his life harder and nothing Kim said or did could deter her from her activities.

"Hey Will. Wii-ill. Will!" She called at him as the sky rumbled unhappily above her. When he glanced at her, she continued, "Can you do me a favor, Willy?"

"No." He averted his eyes, heading for the kitchen. Betty had requested an apple and he was on his way to retrieve one.

"Why not?" Shego leaned against the mast, pausing from her mopping. As punishment for teasing Will, Kim had given her a soggy mop and bucket with the orders of swabbing the deck.

He didn't bother answering her. She made a discontented noise, clicking her tongue on the back of her teeth, and went back to sloshing water around, hoping to make it slippery enough to make him fall.

As luck would have it, Kim went through it first.

"Captain! Don't…" The words died on Shego's lips as Kim slid around the deck, unable to stop herself. A rambunctious wave catapulted against the ship, sending Kim flying overboard. Shego cursed wildly as she ran to the rail, "Man overboard! Man overboard!"

The crew ran to her side, some slipping around on the deck, but most avoiding the wetness. They were deadly silent as they stared down at their captain, who at the moment was being tossed around like a rag doll. Nobody seemed inclined to jump in, so Shego grabbed a rope, tying it rapidly around her stomach, and leapt in.

The waves beat at her, angry at the intrusion. Shego wasn't the strongest swimmer, but she believed that she was predisposed to be passable at anything she put her mind to. Letting Kim drown wasn't an option. So she battled on.

What felt like hours later, though in reality only a few minutes had passed, Shego latched onto Kim's limp form, still being buffeted by the waves. Shego tugged on the rope, hoping one of the crew members would have enough sense to pull them back up.

Moments later, the rope went taut and Shego was pulled towards the still moving vessel. Kim's mouth hung open, dribbling water out both sides, and her eyes were welded shut. Shego gently tapped her cheeks, looking for some sign of life.

The air was knocked out of her as the crew tugged her up the side of the Impossible. Passing gusts of air knocked them into the wooden slats, and Shego was terrified that she would drop the captain. It was not soon enough that they were both up on deck.

Drenching wet, she gazed around at the staring faces, "She's got water in her lungs! Can't somebody help her?" Her voice was weak and hoarse, and she shivered in the cold air.

The crowd parted, letting a short African American boy to waddle forward. He gazed at Shego, then down at the prone form of Kim.

"There's a new technique out there, quite untested, but it should work. If you would please," he gestured down at Kim, "go to her for a moment."

Shego quickly complied, though her body wanted to fall to pieces, "Yeah?"

The boy cleared his throat anxiously, "Tilt her head back, and put your ear near her mouth. Is she breathing?" At Shego's negative response, he continued, "Breath into her mouth…"

He was cut off as Shego interjected, "What?"

"Breath into her mouth. If she isn't breathing on her own, she needs air somehow."

Shego swiped her waterlogged hair out of her face and bent over Kim, forcing her own breath into Kim.

"Now press the palm of your right hand over your left, and position your hands in the center of her chest."

Again, Shego complied. When nothing happened, she glared expectantly at the boy.

"Give her more air, and repeat."

Tension hung thickly in the air as Shego returned to her work, breathing in two breaths, and then rushing to push on Kim's chest. At first it seemed that it wasn't working, but then Kim wheezed, a rush of salt water spewing forth.

Shego wheezed herself, exhausted. Now that Kim wasn't dead or dying, her job was done. She collapsed beside her captain.

Wade stared down at them, "It worked! I'll have to report this to my contacts when we land again!"

Ron wrung his hands nervously, "Shouldn't we get them inside and dry before they catch cold? It looks like rain."

Another crew hand stepped forward, "Oh boy, I'll take care of it. This is a girl's job after all. None of them should be looking at them."

Ron smiled weakly, "That would be sick and wrong. Like wrongsick."

"Right. Nobody come to the captain's cabin for a while." Monique stared down the male deckhands, daring them to try something. When they all scattered, Monique enlisted Betty's help in dragging the two unconscious forms to the cabin.

The two of them quickly stripped the soggy clothing off of Shego and Kim, wrapping dry towels around them. Kim was the first to wake up, and she felt like she had gone through a meat grinder.

"I feel like I went through a meat grinder," she moaned softly, "What happened?"

"You fell overboard," Monique informed her nonchalantly. Now that Kim was awake there was no reason to be worried.

"Who saved me?" Kim demanded, her head still pounding like the devil.

In response, Betty pointed to the other still form in the room, "Shego did, Captain."

Kim rested her head in her hands, "Is she ok?"

Monique shrugged her shoulders, "Should be."

"That's good. I don't want her hurt." Kim gave a fleeting look south and noticed her lack of clothing, "You two are dismissed."

Betty saluted and hurried back to her post, but Monique hung back.

"Look, Captain Possible… Kim, don't get too involved with her. We still don't know much about her."

"I said you were dismissed, Monique." Kim snapped. She was in no mood to be directed by her deckhand.

Monique shrugged, "I'm just saying." And with that she left.

Kim pulled on a set of dry clothes, wishing dearly that her head would stop pounding. And thus she sat down to await Shego's awakening. Outside the cabin the storm exploded, showering rough rain on everything. The crew quickly drew the sails in and locked down loose equipment. Once everything was secure, the crew dove into the barracks, avoiding the wet and dangerous weather.

The only three still out in the rain were Barkin, Betty, and a rather thickheaded man named Brick. The name was quite fitting. Brick had a slightly lower I.Q. than a real brick, but like Barkin, had brawn that was useful in tough situations. The three of them handled any problems that arose on board.

Kim watched her slumbering ward, eyeing her cautiously. Monique's words jangled around her brain, taunting her, but she refused to listen to them. For her to accept them, she would have to accept that she had blooming feelings for the prickly older woman. And that wasn't happening.

There were times, she thought, when Shego was alright. She did small things that only Kim saw that raised her a few bars in Kim's opinion. But on the other hand, she could be so callous. There was something about her personality that drew Kim to her. Shego was basically Kim's complete opposite.

Where Kim felt the need to show her crew kindness and understanding to get their respect, Shego decided that being irritating was the best way to go. After all, Shego had mentioned to Kim, why did she need to be liked by the crew?

It was a new bucket of worms that Kim didn't feel like digging through. There was something between the two of them; at least she thought that was obvious. Monique thought so as well, if she felt so inclined as to comment on it. The question was whether Shego felt the draw as well.

Shego twitched on the floor, one bright green eye stretching open. It took a moment for her to open the other. "Princess?"

"I told you!" Kim snapped out of her thoughts, "It's Kim!"

Snorting, Shego struggled to sit up, clutching the towel to her chest, "So you're ok?"

"Yes… thank you for your assistance."

Shego coughed weakly, "No problem." She didn't have the heart to bring up the fact that she had caused Kim's mayhap as well.

Kim glanced out the window, fidgeting. There was something eating at her, Shego noticed. "Looks dark out there…"

"What's wrong, Princess?"

"Nothing." Kim's answer was almost too quickly given, as if she had prepared for that question long before it was asked.

"There is something, and I'm not stopping until you tell me." Shego adjusted her towel, "Although I would appreciate something to wear."

Kim blushed, fetching a set of underclothes, a pair of breeches, and a loose white shirt. Shego accepted them gratefully and changed quickly; Kim averted her eyes politely. Outside, the storm disappeared just as suddenly as it had hit.

A sunbeam shot through Kim's window, colliding with her red hair and making it dazzle. Shego rolled her eyes; Leave it to the Captain to force nature into making her look pretty. Once again, Shego pushed her luck.

"What's wrong?"

"I said nothing!" Kim practically snarled. A hand flew to her lips. Her response startled even her.

"Stop lying. You're a terribly liar." Shego fought the urge to laugh.

Kim sputtered for a moment before responding, "I can so lie."

"I'm sure you can." Shego conceded, "But not well."

Thrusting her fist down on the desk, Kim fixed an eye on Shego, glaring angrily, "Shut it!"

"Make me."

Kim's lip curled back in distaste, "And to think! I was actually thinking…" She faded away.

Shego leapt upon the opening, "You were thinking… that I'm awesome? No… That I'm too sexy for my shirt? No…" She fell into pondering for a few minutes. A smile lit up her face, "That you were thinking you…"

Her words were cut off by an explosion outside. Both women promptly forgot what they were talking about and hurried outside. Kim's crew was strewn around the ship, quickly loading cannons to return fire.

Kim gazed out across the water at the offending vessel. It was small and didn't look all that well built. In fact, it had the appearance of a catalogue ordered ship. Whoever captained it must not have much money to work with, she figured.

Shego smacked her forehead with one hand; this was getting redundant. "I wish that loser would stop following me!"

This caught Kim's attention, "You know this guy?"

"Captain Lucre, as he likes to call himself. He kidnapped me a while ago and sent a ransom note to my family. If each part of my family sent forth a dollar, he would let me go. I have a fairly large family, outside of my father and four brothers, so the idea was sound. He'd leave a rich man. What he didn't count on was that nobody would pay for me." Shego tried to downplay this, as if it wasn't anything too horrible, but Kim noticed the way Shego's eyes grew glassy.

"And he's after you why?"

"He left me on the island, where you found me, months ago. He told me he'd be back shortly to pick me. Then you found me, which I'm glad. After a while, listening to him is pretty stupid. He goes on and on in this crappy fake accent about making every one in the world give him a dollar."

"Is he dangerous?"

Shego snorted, "He can't fight his way out of a paper bag. I bet he even missed the ship with his cannon fire."

It was true; each shot the small boat fired was terribly off course. It took three minutes for Kim's crew to take down the other boat, or the Frugal as Shego said it was called. Captain Lucre was dragged aboard the Impossible, arms bound.

"Let me go! I said let me go!" His pleas were blatantly ignored. Then he spotted Shego and spazzed out some more, "She belongs to me! I was the one who kidnapped her, fair and square!"

Kim felt the almost irresistible urge to smack him, "She is a member of my crew. She is not going anywhere with you."

That seemed to stop Lucre in his tracks, "You let a merchant's daughter join your crew?"

Shego felt the blood drain from her face, "I don't know what he's talking about."

"You do too." Lucre complained, "Your father is Fredrick Go, of Go and Sons. You're the daughter of a very powerful man."

"Shut up!" Shego yelled violently. She threw herself at him, only to have her arm gripped by Kim.

"Let it go." Kim muttered to her. Bristling, Shego did as she was asked for once, stepping back, "Lucre, I want you to get on your ship and leave. Don't ever attack my ship again, or I will take drastic measures. Consider this a warning."

Kim nodded curtly to Barkin, who escorted their 'guest' off the Impossible. Moments later, the Frugal was spurted off through the water, making a fast get-away. Shego found herself under the scrutiny of the entire crew.

"Heh," she laughed softly, "What? Is something stuck in my teeth?"

Ron stepped forward, "You're from a rich family?"

"Yeah, what of it? Isn't Princess, too?"

"Princess?" Monique stepped in.

"Oh, my bad. Captain Possible."

Kim felt this spiraling out of control, "Look, it doesn't matter where she's from. The point is that she's with us now."

Monique shook her head and went back to her duties, slowly followed by the rest of the crew. Ron patted Kim on the shoulder before heading up to the helm with Barkin.

Shego stared at Kim briefly, before casting her eyes away, "So you don't care?"

"Why would I?"

Shrugging, Shego retorted, "Like I know."

"Lay off, Shego." Kim felt like her life was a slow-motion shipwreck waiting to happen. Day by day she was getting closer to the pointy rocks waiting to smash her life to bits. "Will anybody else be chasing you?"

Shego shook her head, "No. No one else should be coming after me."

Kim nodded, closing her eyes in thought. She desperately hoped those weren't famous last words.


	4. Whales Have the Most Fun

Disclaimer – Well, I'm bored with this. I'm a poor bum with nothing but a hand knit sock. That I didn't knit by hand.

Warning – Yarr.

Other – Er, I didn't mean for this to go so long without update. A lot of life stuff was happening, the most "fun" of which was breaking my toe. But I do plan on finishing this story. I'll be updating more regularly I hope. I'm also hoping this chapter is long enough x.x This is kind of the interlude, I suppose.

According to Conky, the word of the day is Rancid. So when you read the word rancid, scream real loud.

* * *

"So what were you trying to tell me?" Shego leaned on her mop, leering at the captain. It was the day after fighting Captain Lucre and the Impossible was still in good shape. The only thing that could possibly be found wrong was a lack of cannon balls, gun powder, and bullets. Also on the lack of supply list was food. Meals had become sparse. 

Kim glared at her, "I wasn't telling you anything. Get back to swabbing, swabby."

"You were so telling me that you couldn't believe that you actually thought that I was—"

Her words were cut off by Kim stalking past her. Kim managed to jam her shoulder into Shego, tossing Shego off balance. The bucket of soapy water happened to be in Shego's line of direction, and Shego toppled over it, dousing herself and the deck. Kim bit back a laugh. Sometimes picking on Shego was more fun that she would like to think.

She'd never picked on anyone before Shego had come along, other than her little brothers, but that was expected of an older sister. Shego just tweaked her out. That's the only way she could explain it.

"Come back here and fight like a man!" Shego yelled angrily from the ground.

Kim whirled back around, "What was that?"

"You're a weak woman! You couldn't fight your way out of a paper bag!" She challenged, getting to her feet. She slid back into a fighting stance.

Kim felt something in her snap. Shego was going too far. "Take it back, Shego, or get off my ship."

"Make me." Shego beckoned with her hand, a taunting smile playing out on her lips.

"Fine." Kim darted forward, reaching for her rapier.

"Hand to hand, Princess. None of those weapons of yours." Shego teased.

Kim threw them aside with an angry flourish, "Fine by me." Again, she charged, sweeping her left leg up. She landed a good hard kick on Shego's abdomen.

Shego took a step back, surprised by Kim's skill. All this time she had thought Kim to be all talk and no action. No matter, she thought. She returned the favor by jamming a fist against Kim's chin. Kim barely flinched; instead she swung her own punch at Shego's face.

Darting back just in time, Shego tried to make a decision. She had told Kim that no outside weapons were to be used, but did that mean she couldn't use her special abilities? They weren't outside of her body, so they weren't outside weapons, but it felt like cheating. And for once in her life, Shego didn't want to cheat in a fight.

"Look, Kimmie, I could whip you if I could use my special techniques. Give it up before I hurt you."

Kim shook her head emphatically. There was no way this pain in the neck was getting the best of her, "I won't lose to you."

Shego shrugged, "I really don't want to do this, pumpkin. You're a great captain, but you're just not good enough."

"We've been fighting equally, I'd have to say. So if I'm bad, you're equally so." Kim spat out. While they were fighting, the crew had gathered around. There was no backing down.

Shego looked down at her hands and made her decision. "Maybe if I show you what I can do, you'll let it go." She glanced around and spotted one of the last cannon balls lying on the ground. With great ease, she picked it up, testing the weight.

"What are you doing? You were the one who said no weapons." Kim accused.

"I'm not using this as a weapon." Shego muttered, intent on what she was doing. She held the cannon ball with her left hand and lit her other hand up in what appeared to be green flames.

Kim dropped her defensive stance, "What the heck is that?"

Shego threw the ball high up in the air as if it were no heavier than a feather and then blasted the flying object with a well contained plasma blast. The ball exploded moments after the fire touched it.

"That, my dear captain, would be my special abilities." Shego smirked. "Would you like to test them yourself?"

Kim shook her head, "You are no longer a part of this crew. Throw her in the brig." It was one thing to out-do your captain, but quite another to do that in front of the whole crew. Shego had stepped over the line this time.

Brick and Barkin seized Shego's arms, careful to avoid her hands and began to drag her away. Shego cast a betrayed look towards Kim, filled with hurt and distaste.

Kim couldn't hold eye contact with her. She turned and marched to her personal quarters, unwilling to face the crew. This didn't feel right to her. Shego had not done anything wrong, specifically. All she had really done was tick off Kim.

Shego thought it was best to just go along with her captors. After all, even if she got free, where would she go?

"So, boys, do you really think my plasma is just in my hands?"

They looked at each other, faint worry plastering their faces.

Brick answered first, "I dunno… Does it?"

Shego laughed roughly, "Of course not." They dropped her arms like they were hot potatoes. She snorted, "Good. I'm going to go with you both to the brig like a good little prisoner, but you don't need to drag me."

Barkin nodded slowly, processing, "So we should finish taking you down to the brig?"

"Yes, you should." Shego clarified.

Brick smiled stupidly and strutted on. Barkin was not far behind. Sighing unhappily, Shego followed along, trailing a few feet behind them. She wasn't especially looking forward to spending time in a dark, damp prison cell.

Her assumptions about the brig were correct. The floor had a thin layer of water coating it and the only light came from a withering candle in the center of the room. Brick lead her into the cell and shut the door. Using one key off a set of ten or so, he locked the door. The two of them lumbered away, content with their job well done.

Lighting up one of her hands, Shego got a better look around. There was a small ratty hammock in one corner and a small chair in the other. The rest of the cell was bare. As much as she would have loved to have taken a nap, the hammock didn't look like it would hold her weight, so she settled on the chair instead.

Once her weight was upon it, it shattered underneath her. Picking splinters out of her legs, she sat in the water, still wet from the bucket of water earlier, and felt like crap.

Kim stared down at her desk. It had hurt, slightly, to make her boys take Shego away. The brig was not used much on her ship, so the commodities down there were probably lacking in more ways than one.

She would bring something nice down there for Shego, Kim decided miserably. It was wrong to lock Shego down there. Sometimes, Kim dejectedly thought, having a conscience made it hard to do bad things, which in turn made her a weak pirate captain.

Getting to her feet, she went to the kitchen and dug around for some spare bits of food. That was harder than she would have liked. They would need to detour somewhere to get some food or they might starve to death. After scrounging for a while, Kim found an apple and slunk down to the brig.

The light was very dim, a little bit of information she had forgotten, but a green flame in the corner cast an eerie glow around the small area. Kim clutched the apple tightly, fear dripping down her spine.

"Shego?" Her voice wavered ever so slightly, "That's you, isn't it?"

The only response she got was a hollow laugh.

"Look, Shego, I know I shouldn't have locked you up." Kim paced a little closer, feet barely splashing in the shallow water. "I just… you really know how to… tweak me."

The flames brightened, lighting the entire room up now. Shego was still sitting in puddle, a flaming splinter burned in her leg. "Oh, please, Captain. Don't lower yourself to my presence."

Kim stared at the burning wood chip, "What… what are you doing?"

"I got some splinters. It's easiest to just burn them out. Doesn't hurt my skin, after all." Shego lit another one up.

"I brought you an apple." Kim hesitantly offered it forth.

Shego paused from her work, glancing up at Kim, "Is that supposed to be some sort of peace offering? 'Cause I was expecting a little bit… more."

"It's all we have." Kim threw Shego the apple, leaning against the bars. She didn't quite know how to pull herself out of this predicament, "Shego, I can't exactly just let you free now."

"Why not?" Shego bit into the apple, chewing slowly, "Don' want your crew.."

"Yes. I don't want my crew to see my weakness." Kim finished for her.

Shego swallowed, "You admit you have weaknesses?"

"Of course." Kim sniffed, "Nobody is perfect."

"So why can't your crew see that you have mercy and a conscience?" It was an idle question, one that had an answer that Shego didn't really care to hear. It was the question Kim had been asking her self a lot recently.

"I just… It's complicated." Kim turned her face away from the light, trying to hide the confusion in her eyes.

"I'm listening." Shego threw the flames back and forth between her hands.

The words spewed forth, from somewhere deep inside. Kim half wished she could throw a padlock on her lips and toss the key overboard. "I feel like they all expect me to be something I'm not. They all want a Captain who's a mighty and terrible figure, bloody sword never sheathed, and a conscience as black as night. And I can't give that to them. They're stuck with… A girl who can't seem to make up her mind."

Shego paused in her flame toss, "A little indecisive are we?" She was vaguely listening.

"Yes! I can't decide if I want to go home and play the innocent daughter, marry a rich man, bear rich children, and spend my life completely unhappy, but content that the people around me are as happy as they'll ever get, or if I want to remain a pirate. If I want to remain a selfish person out for personal gain because I can't face the life my parents set out for me." Kim ended her mini-speech by sliding down to the ground, ignoring the mass of wetness that now encompassed her pants. Her back was pressed tightly against the bars.

"You're just a mess, aren't you." It was spoken as a statement rather than a question. Shego had no doubt that Kim was a complete wreck.

"Ugh." Kim ground out as she buried her face into her arms. The tips of her hair gently caressed the layer of dirty water.

"And how does this relate to letting me out of here?"

"If I let you go, I look like I can't stick by my decisions. I can't keep you locked up. I can't do… anything right." Her words were fairly flat, lacking all energy and emotion. She felt drained to the point of exhaustion.

Shego approached the edge of her confined space, "You could say… I offered to do whatever it took to get back on your crew. You know, deck-duty for a month."

Kim shook her head, "I couldn't lie like that."

"You're such an odd pirate." The dryness laced in her voice was nearly undetectable as she spoke. Oddly, she noted silently, she didn't want Kim hurting more than she already was. Kim sniffled quietly, not looking up. Shego stretched a hand through the metal bars, placing a pale green hand on Kim's arm. "You need to take it easy. Being a Captain should come second to your sanity."

Kim covered Shego's hand with a clammy hand of her own, "I couldn't step down. My crew depends on me."

Shego sighed, "You're being difficult, Princess."

"Could you not call me that?" Kim whispered, "Names like that are usually, I don't know, terms of endearment. As far as I know, we aren't romantically entangled."

"It's a pet-name between friends." Shego offered. She wasn't sure herself why she called Kim these things. It just seemed to jump out of her mouth, "So how about letting me out, Pumpkin?"

Kim's hand flew to her breast pocket, "I… I can do that." The keys clattered out and Kim hesitantly unlocked the jail cell, "I really am sorry about this whole mess."

Shego cracked her knuckles as she stalked out of the cramped area, "Hmph. I suppose…" She trailed off for a second. Disbelief filtered through her mind. She was actually considering taking the blame? Preposterous. "I suppose it was my fault as well."

Kim gave a half-hearted smile, "I appreciate the thought."

Shego's smirk drained into a small frown, "Can we get out of here? I'm soggy, cranky, and irritated. I need Will."

That brought a real smile to Kim's face, "Leave the kid alone. He's got a good heart, but he's just a little too into his work."

"We really need to get that kid a girlfriend." Shego snorted derisively. Kim giggled softly.

"You really are too much."

* * *

"Cheater!" Ron threw his cards onto the barrel, "Liar!" He pushed a stack of gold coins towards a demonically grinning Shego. 

"Don't be such a loser." Shego added the money into her hoard.

"I'm not a loser!" Ron was still fuming.

Kim glanced at her two feuding crew members, "Ron, it is just poker."

"I know… But she's cheating." He crossed his arms and stuck his nose into the air.

"You call anyone a cheater if they beat your pair of threes." Kim sighed; a group of them had gotten together in Kim's cabin for a friendly game of poker which, thanks mostly in part to Ron, had turned into a blood bath of verbal assault. If nothing else, Ron had an arsenal of childish insults.

Rufus started restacking the deck of cards, shuffling them awkwardly. He emitted a squeak when the edge of a card nipped his pale, naked skin. Ron's immature behavior ceased when he noticed his little buddy's plight. He snagged the deck and began to shuffle in earnest.

Shego leaned back in her chair, staring around the circle. The players included Ron, Kim, Monique, and Betty. Ron had already accused Betty of having some sort of cheating machine under her eye patch – she had beaten his pair of twos with a pair of fives. Monique was cheating by distracting him with her flashy earrings and sparse dress; Kim had cheated by being Captain and, therefore, unbeatable; Shego… well, Shego was just a cheater.

The cards were dealt again. Shego threw one of her coins in, "What do you say we up the ante?"

Kim swallowed nervously. Anything Shego suggested was probably lewd and inappropriate. Ron apparently assumed the same thing, a ruby red blush staining his large ears.

Monique added her coin in, staring Shego down, "What do you have in mind?"

Betty threw her last few coins in, "I don't want to stick around for this. Permission to go pester Will?"

Shego's influence had spread through some of the more rowdy crew members. Will Hunting, as it was called now, was quite the popular sporting event.

Kim nodded, "But please. Don't have him do anything as stupid as last time."

"But nobody got hurt. Except him, I guess. He's still icing his groin." Shego put in. Ron winced, his hand unconsciously flying to protect his crotch. Betty walked off, leaving the four of them to play.

"I was thinking something along the lines of… ship-type duties." Shego smirked. She'd do anything to get out of mopping the deck.

Kim smiled, "And here I thought you were going to suggest strip poker."

Shego shrugged, "Some things are more important than seeing your Captain naked. Although, Ronnie would be the first one going commando."

Ron scowled indignantly, "Would not."

Rufus pushed Ron's five coins, "Would too!"

"Mutiny…" Ron muttered under his breath, "Well what will Kim bet? No offence, Captain, but you don't really participate in our duties."

Kim fiddled with her coins, "I'll sit it out, but to add to the fun, the person with the most money at the end can be captain for a day."

Ron cracked his knuckles, "We'll play one round, then. Winner takes the prize, losers divvy up the chores?"

Monique settled in, "I'm in."

Shego nodded her approval as Ron began dealing out. Her face remained straight and blank, betraying none of the elation she felt from her cards. Ron, on the other hand, had the world's worst poker face. His beaming smile drooped into a slight frown, his eye brows jumped half way up his forehead. He threw the rest of his coins in, rubbing a finger along his upper lip.

Shego snorted, "You know how you can tell someone's bluffing?" Ron shook his head, averting his eyes, "Bluffers like touching their face. They can't make eye contact. And they sweat a lot."

Ron wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead, "Gosh, is the heat on, KP? Can we turn it down?"

"Ron, we're on a boat out in the middle of nowhere. There's no heating." Kim sighed.

Wiping his hands on his pants, Ron exchanged cards as was necessary to the game. Kim watched with mild interest – she had no preference of winner. Ron would make a ferociously bad captain, but he'd come to her with any problems. Monique would have no problems at all, but Shego… Shego would be a terror.

Kim's face fell slightly. In her mind she imagined Shego standing up by the helm of the ship, staring down at her toiling crew, a manic smile plastered on her face. She could hear the evil laughter now.

"Game's over." Kim stood up suddenly, "All bet's are off."

Shego glared at her, "What the hell, Princess!"

"I've told you not to call me that." Kim muttered, "I was just thinking, I shouldn't give up my duties on a card game. That would be irresponsible. So my bet is off the table."

Shego slammed her fist into the barrel, shattering it, "Look, Princess, a bet's a bet. You can't pull out now."

Ron looked between the two women and made a smart decision. He made a mad dash for the door, fumbling with the door handle. Stumbling free of the room, he ran down to the deck, arms flailing wildly.

Rolling her eyes, Monique got to her feet as well, "Shego, lay off, girl. It's just a game."

Kim's eyes never left Shego's face, "Monique, go check on Ron. Knowing him, he'll probably be tangled up in ropes by now."

"KP! HELP! THE ROPES ARE ATTACKING!!" Ron's voice wailed from the distance.

Monique hesitated, staring at Shego's angry gaze, but nodded and left, shutting the door behind her. As soon as she heard the door click shut, Shego pushed Kim's shoulder, trying to provoke an attack.

"I'm not going to fight you Shego." Kim shrugged off the offence to her person.

"Like hell you won't. You're just chicken." Shego spat.

"I know you could fry me," Kim acquiesced, "but that's not why I won't fight you. I've had enough tussles to know how to pick my battles. This just isn't worth the effort."

Shego didn't lose any of her steam. Instead of backing down, as Kim thought she would, she threw a punch, smashing across Kim's face. The beginnings of a rancid purple bruise started at the base of Kim's cheek bone.

Kim fell against the wall, her hand clutching her face. Part of her wanted to smack Shego around for hitting her. The other part, though, wanted her to just take it. Her self doubt told her she deserved it. Her pride told her to take a swing. Struggling internally, she didn't notice Shego sliding up beside her.

Shego reached out, her hand tracing the curve of Kim's cheek, "Princess…" It shouldn't feel this way after hitting someone, Shego complained silently, you were supposed to hit someone and feel good about it. Not feel regret.

"Captain Possible." Kim murmured quietly. The pain in her cheek was flaring on the contact, but she kept that hidden. It was always her way to never show other's how she really felt. Put on the brave front and all.

"Kimmie." The fingers paused just over the central bruising, "I didn't mean…" This was harder than she thought it would be, "I'm so… I'm sorry."

Kim glanced up, her eyes betraying the hurt she felt, "Thank you. You can go now. I'll… clean up in here." She gazed at the shattered wood covering her polished floor.

"I should help." Shego removed her hand and went to start pushing chunks of wood together. Kim joined her on the floor, being careful not to further injure herself by impaling herself on a jagged edge.

They worked silently, other than Kim's occasional sigh or heavy breath. The last piece of wood stared at them, a few feet away. Kim grabbed it, only to find Shego's hand was there first. She glanced down at their hands, hers covering Shego's covering the wood, and blushed a fierce scarlet.

She released and got to her feet, fiddling with her clothes and avoiding eye contact, "Thank you for your help. You are dismissed."

Shego smirked, her fire relighting, "Captain's blushing. Why you blushing, Captain? Huh, Princess?"

"Did you hear me? Dismissed!" Kim tried to fight the blush down, and failed.

"Someone's embarrassed." Shego taunted lightly. She stepped in closer until they were less than a foot apart.

"Dis… Shego, what are you doing?" Kim blurted out, finally allowing herself to look at the green woman.

Shego winked at her, placing a hand on Kim's waist, "What would you do if I stole a kiss right now?"

Kim was saved from answering, though, when someone pounded on her door.

"Kim! You'll never believe it! Come see!" Ron hollered, thoroughly hyped over something outside. Kim let out the breath she had been holding and exited. Ron dragged her to the railing.

Underneath the boat, a pod of whales moved on their way, surfacing to blow jets of water straight into the sky and arch gracefully back into the depths. The last things to enter the water were the giant V shaped tales, slapping the water with a thwap.

Shego joined them, gazing out at the majestic giants, "You don't see those very often, do you?" She rested her hands on the wooden slats.

Kim smiled softly in the sunset, watching the whales disperse. She swallowed softly and placed her hand on top of Shego's, "Not often enough."


	5. I'd Rather Have Dessert

Disclaimer – I wish I owned Kim Possible. Things would be different. Like, Ron would wear shiny toasters as pajamas. But I don't own it.

Warning – I guess I should really post a warning. But… if you're reading my story, you must know something's going along with Shego and Kim, and there might be pirate fighting. Er, slight language?

Other – I wish I had a good excuse for not updating quickly. I've had this written for weeks, but not typed. Feel free to smack me...

* * *

The ship scurried along, making a mad dash for the nearest island, dancing as it skipped from soaking surface to watery wave. Land sparkled in the distance, a tantalizing jewel to a starving crew.

Kim gripped the railing, her knuckles white. It had been a long two days. The last bits of food had disappeared into the waiting stomachs of her hungry crew and the lot of them was close to killing each other. Shego had been all for lynching Will and having Du-kabobs for dinner.

Shivering, Kim shook her head. Tempers were running high. If land hadn't been spotted, there was no doubt in her mind that she would be down a crew member. She waited patiently as her crew assembled behind her, waiting for the speech she was bound to give. Turning away from the edge, she looked them over sternly.

"I want no trouble this time." Her eyes passed over Shego, "I want no bar fights," over Will, who had the decency to flush scarlet and hide his face, "No attention. We've never stopped here before. This town and these people may not take kindly to us. Do not, I repeat, do not provoke them." Her voice echoed over the silent crew. "Collect supplies and return just after sunset. Dismissed."

She resumed her post, watching the slowly growing island port. Shego snuck up beside her, a playful smirk attached to her face.

"Why'd you look at me?" Shego elbowed Kim gently, "We both know that I don't cause trouble."

"In the sense that a shark causes no trouble for vulnerable fish?" Kim retorted, unable to keep the smile off her face.

"Just remember to practice what you preach."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Just as quickly, her smile dropped, "I behave properly. I am a Captain."

"Yeah, yeah. Keep out of trouble, though. Sometimes you don't have to look for it, it just finds you." Shego nodded once and left Kim staring at the water. All of her hot air deflated and Kim remained deposed there until the ship entered the harbor.

She let the crew take care of the boat, stepping onto dry land for the first time in a long while. The harbor master approached, his book propped open on one hand.

"Name?"

"Kimberly Anne." She responded, leaving off her infamous last name.

"Three shillings."

She threw him five, "Keep it."

He smiled at her, ducking his head, "As you wish, ma'am."

Kim entered the town, glancing around uneasily. She had a sense of foreboding hanging around her, one that she couldn't shoo away. Shaking her head slowly, Kim pushed the feeling away – she felt she was just being silly. There was nothing to worry about.

Her first stop in town was to be the local tavern to collect gossip. There was always the chance she and her crew might be mentioned, or news of pirate hunters in the area. It never hurt to be careful.

Kim tapped the shoulder of a young woman walking along the road. "I'm sorry to bother you, but could you point me in the direction of the tavern?"

The woman smiled and nodded, "Sally's Tavern would be what you're looking for. Down the road, take the first right you find. It'll be right in front of you."

"Thank you, ma'am. Have a nice evening." Kim nodded politely and walked off, mumbling the directions under her breath.

Unbeknownst to her, Shego followed her, keeping to the shadows. Watching her carefully, Shego tailed her into the drinking hall, Kim's unofficial guardian. She watched as Kim took her seat at the bar, ordering a small beverage.

There was a group of men crowding a table in the darkest corner of the large room. The largest man was very bulky, arms at least as thick as pint mug. He was surrounded by three or four skinnier fellows, all of them decked out in piercings and tattoos. They laughed raucously at whatever the larger man said.

Shego sniffed. Jerks like those fellows could only mean trouble. She watched, with growing anger, as they got up to leave. They brushed past Kim, rudely shoving her smaller form. Kim took it with no physical fight, though her bright eyes narrowed at the attention.

Grumbling, Kim sipped from her drink. On either side of her she had a weathered man, each with a beer belly to be proud of. Kim glanced at the one on her left, "So, who were those guys?"

"They're these pirate hunters. Some rich man down in Portsmuth hired them. They've been lounging about here for less than a week."

He was complemented by Kim's other neighbor, leaning over his beer, "They've been nothing but trouble. Eating our food, causing trouble. The mayor tried to get rid of them, but they're set on staying here until they get word of the boat they're chasing."

"Which boat is that?" Kim asked. Her heart plummeted as she already knew the answer.

"Some bloody pirate ship. What was she called, Mac?"

"Somethin' like the Possible? Tossible?"

"The Impossible." Kim murmured. Her mind whirled away, wondering if Shego's father would really be so angry as to send a pirate hunter after his own daughter. Did he really know the consequences of that action? Most pirate hunters were not gentle with their prey.

The two men looked at her, faces contorted with curiosity, "You know her?"

"I only know the name, heard the stories." Kim covered quickly, "I'm just here to pick up supplies myself."

Shego left her hiding spot in the corner and stalked forward. She grabbed Kim's arm, "Can I borrow you a second, Princess?"

Kim glanced at her, hiding the surprise in her eyes, "I suppose. Did you follow me?"

Shrugging, Shego tugged her away, "Yeah, what of it? Look, we should get out of her before something bad happens."

"Nothing's going to happen." Kim murmured, doubt swirling in her eyes. There was that feeling again. "The ship is far enough in the harbor that nobody will see. And what are the odds they'd be on the same island as us? They won't think to look for us here."

Shego gave up, sitting down at a small table yards away from the bar, "At least stop talking to those men. I think the fat one was going to attack you."

"You're making that up," Kim accused, a small smile fighting to get onto her lips.

"So?" Shego laughed slightly, trying to lighten her own mood, "I can be protective can't I?"

"Not over me." Kim sniffed, "I'm your captain."

"Captain's need watching over just as much as village idiots. The difference is that the idiot won't attract as much trouble."

"Cut it out." Kim propped her elbow on the table, resting a cheek on her fist. She glared in every direction but at Shego.

"I would, but I'm not allowed to play with scissors anymore. Or knives. Or spoons, as it is." Shego tried valiantly to snap Kim's blackening mood.

"Haha." Kim muttered. "Very funny. It's your fault the hunters are here, you know."

Shego fell silent, a dark cloud of guilt hanging over her, "I'm responsible for my idiot of a father?"

"You are when you got him so angry that he sent hunters after you." Kim let her head lie on the table, her face the picture of pure misery.

"You're the one who dragged us to Portsmuth in the first place, Captain." Shego hissed, and then proceeded to give Kim the cold shoulder.

Shego ordered herself a drink and sat there in a rebellious quiet.. Kim had shot her down completely, and she wasn't about to spend her energy on a lost cause. They sat there in an tense silence, time drizzling past at a snail's pace. Every once in a while, one of them would take a sip from their glass, or cough slightly.

Their stand off was shattered as shouts drifted in from outside, "KIM? KIIIM! K.P.??"

Kim quickly got to her feet, "That sounds like Ron."

Shego sighed, "It has to be. No other male I know has the ability to wail like a dying a cow."

Glaring, Kim stomped out of the tavern, almost running directly into Ron.

"Kim? I've been looking everywhere for you! We have a slight… problem." His eyes were wide and panicked.

"What happened?"

Ron led the two women back to the harbor, pointing to a tiny dot at the mouth of the harbor. Shego stared at it, squinting.

"What the hell is that?" She demanded, wondering if the kid was playing some sort of stupid joke.

"Bonnie took the Impossible, Kim. Ran off with it and the crew." Ron sniffled out.

Shego pushed him slightly, "You're still here. Why didn't you fight for it?"

Ron rubbed his arm, "I did too fight! I just… tripped, that's all."

"I meant," Shego sighed. Dealing with idiots was so tedious, "why didn't you verbally talk the crew out of it?"

Ron's face heated up, an angry blush swirling around his ears, "I tried!"

As they argued, Kim's fists tightened, her eyes glued on the horizon. "I knew she was bad news! That girl is such a… a… urgh!" Kim's fist slammed into her own thigh, making her wince.

Shego grabbed her hand, "Easy, girl. Tell us exactly what happened."

Ron threw his hands into the air, flustered, "As soon as you left, Bonnie started ranting that you were running this crew into the ground. Letting us run out of food, protecting Shego, and making bad choices…" Ron glanced at the tiny ship, "And the crew listened to her. I tried to tell them that Bonnie was making a mountain out of a mole hill, but they..."

Kim stared at the ground, heart sinking. For a moment, she couldn't breathe. Her brain had shorted out, or so it felt. This information was almost too much for her to handle. It didn't make sense.

"So I was right…" Her voice faltered slightly. She had been a fool to even try being a pirate captain. It was painfully obvious that she was no good at it.

Shego huffed, "What a bitch. Now what are we supposed to do?"

Kim slowly shook her head. What was there to do?

Ron huffed indignantly in her peripheral vision, "Man, this is totally not cool."

"Kim?" Shego murmured, eyes trained on Kim's suddenly downcast form. When she didn't get an answer again, she laid a hand on Kim's shoulder, "You still have Ron and me."

Kim sniffled softly and pressed herself on Shego, hiding her face in the folds of Shego's clothing. At first all Shego could bring herself to do was awkwardly pat Kim's head, but eventually she wrapped an arm around Kim, rubbing comforting circles on Kim's back.

Ron stepped over, jaw dropping open, but his words were lost in his mind. He half-raised one hand, as if to touch her, but it dropped back to his side. Clearing his throat, he suddenly realized how uncomfortable he was.

"What next? Where do we go?" He pondered.

Kim pulled her face away from Shego's warm form and eyed him a moment, "We go home."


End file.
